I'm out here posting because the woman who promised to love, honor, and hold the remote is in the other room watching Showbiz Tonight on CNN or Headline News or whatever. So I decided to write something, anything, to avoid hearing one more thing about Michael or Jon and Kate or Hulk Hogan's fucking divorce. In a way, I'm glad because I've had a mental block the last couple days that's kept me from writing anything worth a shit.
What is so damn amazing to the unwashed masses about the private lives of anyone? Why should I care who gave Bret Michaels an STD? (Editor's note: The veracity of the claim that Bret Michaels received an STD from anyone remains to be proven. To our knowledge, Mr. Michaels has never had an STD.) .... Sorry, the editors had to muck about in my column. I don't know for sure if he ever had clap, but touring at least 200 nights a year times at least six groupies per band member: you do the math.
But we have become a nation of voyeurs. I can't say that I have never watched a reality television show, because I honestly don't know. I may have and not remembered. But I do not purposefully set out to watch anything, not the Real World, not American Idol, or any of those. I feel it cheapens us as a society. And we have cheapened ourselves enough already.